Small People

Student N: Everybody knows that small people have loud voices.
Student J: That's not true, because D----- is small and he's normal!

Interesting compliment

In the copy room....

Another teacher: I just have one more copy to make.
Me: No worries, take your time.
Other teacher: Oh, I didn't know that was your voice. You have a cool voice!

Class Pet

On Friday, we were coming in from recess and I found one of my students already in the classroom (without permission).

Me: What are you doing in here?
Student S: Can I tell you the truth?
Me: Um, YES!
Student S: Well, I wanted to take the class fish home as my pet.

Realizing that the floor and computer table are covered with water, and in the student's hands is a ziplock bag with water in it....

Student S: It flopped out of my hands and I couldn't pick it back up.
Me: Well, it's dead now.

Mistake Reflection

Students had to write about a time they made a mistake and the lesson they learned from it....

First sentence of the student reflection: A time I had made a mistake is when I was at camp and I called this girl's sister a ugly migit.

Book Fair

While at the school book fair....

Student T: Mrs. Tull!!!!! There's a Justin Bieber book!!!! (practically screaming)

5 minutes later...

Same student: Mrs. Tull!!!!! There's a Justin Bieber poster toooooo!!!!


I just shook my head at her...

Spelling

Spelling word: PLEASURE

Sentence student turned in: I pleasure you.


OH geez!

Science review

The kids have their end of the marking period science test tomorrow so we were doing a review in class using Senteo clickers. We were going over the answers....

Question: "Which of these is NOT a solution?"
The answer choices: A) hot cocoa B) Italian salad dressing
C) Maple syrup D) lemonade

Most of the kids put either Italian salad dressing (the correct answer) or maple syrup.

Me: "Will somebody share why they think the answer is maple syrup?"
Student T: "Because you can take the bacon out of it."
Me: "Bacon?? In syrup?? Have you ever been to IHOP and had bacon in the syrup?"
Student T: "Oh, guess not."

The sad thing was, that I had about 5 kids agree with her that bacon was in maple syrup....gross.

Deaf or death???

We were reading a story about Roberto Clemente and how he helped a boy that was deaf....

Me: "So what does it mean if you are deaf?"
Student K: "That you are dying."

I couldn't even say anything, I lost it with laughter for a good 5 minutes....and the class lost it with me.

In the student's defense, he thought I said "death".

Rosa Parks

The kids were given a Rosa Parks reading passage and needed to answer questions on her....


Q: What do you think is meant when the last paragraph states that Mrs. Parks had a “quiet strength?”

A: She didn’t have alot of energy so she was probaly dying.

baseball

Student C: Is that your favorite baseball player hanging up?
Me: Well, I do love Ryan Zimmerman!!
Student C: Does your husband know about this? (with arms crossed)

Appearances

These all happened at different points in the same day....I wish they were this observant and engaged in what they are learning....


Student T: "You look so tall and pretty today."

Student K: "You look weird wearing hoop earrings."

Student D: "Did you get a perm?"

Numbers In Our World

While doing an intro math lesson....

I had 5 numbers on the board that represented something about my life and the kids had to guess what those numbers meant...for example: 2,006 was the year I graduated college.

Number on the board: 1,953
Me: So what do you think this number represents?
Student: The year you were born?
Me: Wow, you think I look like I'm 57??

......Sorry kids, I'm only 25. That's the year my parents were born.

Never tell an adult this!!

Student J: "Mrs. Tull! You have gray hair!"
Me: "WHATTTT! WHERE?" Then I frantically start rubbing my hair....
Student J: "Well, turn to the side...(I turn)...Oh, I was wrong, no gray hair yet."
Me: "Please never scare me like that again!"

Miley Cyrus

While eating lunch with the kids....

In all of our get to know you activities, I have discovered (much to my dismay) that a lot of the girls in my class LOVE Justin Bieber. So I asked...

Me: "Do you like Miley Cyrus too?"
Justin Bieber lover: "No, she doesn't have good morals."
Me: "Oh, and how do you know that?"
A boy in my class who was listening in: "She's a pole dancer."
Me: "What???"
Another boy: "Well, basically a stripper."
Me: "Oh my, let's not talk about her anymore."

I'm back!

So, I took a long break from blogging because I became incredibly busy preparing my kids for all of their end of year testing....but I'm back now and ready to share some gems!

First day of school:

Student S: "We're going to have a good year this year."
Me: "Why's that?"
Student S: "We don't have any of the bad kids in our class!"

This is when I love my kids......

Student N: "Mrs. Tull, why aren't you a supermodel? Is it because you aren't tall enough?"

LOVE LOVE LOVE this kid!

Reason for Absence

So the same student that was late to see a few weeks prior had another excuse....

Student T: "Mrs. Tull? The reason I wasn't at school on Wednesday and Thursday was because my house got flooded and my shoes were wet."

Not that funny, but really....Two days off for wet shoes? I wish I could use that excuse!

hitting a girl

Student A: "You can't hit a girl. It's against the law."

School Dance

Student G: "Mrs. Tull, you gonna shake your tail feathers at the school dance?"
Me: "Yeah, I'm also gonna Shake it Like a Polaroid Picture."

lips

During dismissal....

Student J: (he just put on chapstick) "Mrs. Tull, does it look like I have lip gloss on?"
Me: (about 10 feet away) "Not from here, it doesn't look like it."
Another student: "HAHA, Yes it does!!"
Me: "Well, ya know what? He's going to be happier because he won't have chapped lips!"
Another student: "Yeah, he'll have sexy lips!"

Can we talk in private?

Student T came in late to class....about 45 minutes late.

Student T: "Can I talk to you in private?"
Me: "Yes, of course, let's go over here..." (and I'm thinking it's something serious)
Student T: "The reason I came in late today, is because I couldn't find one of my shoes."
Me: (holding in laughter) "Okay, well, that's fine."
Student T: "I just wanted you to know."
Me: "Well thank you!"

Mysteries

The Assignment: Think of two stories that have the genre of 'Mystery' and compare and contrast them.

Student D: "Can we write about girls? They sure are a mystery to me! I mean, we gotta figure you all out and stuff!"

Hummer, no Hunter

Student G: "Mrs. Tull, I bet I know your password."
Me: "Oh yeah? What is it?"
Student G: "It's your husband's name!"
Another teacher: "What's her husband's name?"
Student G: "Hummer?"

Old

After we took our quarterly test I had the kids stretch and jump up and down to release their energy....

Student L: "Mrs. Tull - you too old to be jumpin!"

dandruff

A very serious conversation with a 10-year old boy....

Me: "So G, why do you put grease on your hair?"
G: "So I don't get dry skin."
Me: "Yeah, but why not just use conditioner?"
G: "Grease works better. You know dry and flaky skin is called dandruff! And you have dandruff too! But you have blond hair, so you can't see it."

REALLY?! since when do I have blond hair?

Balls

definitely set myself up by complete accident.........working on possessive nouns....my example....

Me: "So imagine that I want to go to the sports store, Dicks, to buy balls...."

Yeah, the little boys couldn't control their laughter....followed by the little girls delayed realization. Then, I couldn't stop laughing either....so I said...

"FINE! We're going to Wal-Mart for the balls!"

Apparently Height Matters

Student from another class: "Well we know you're younger than Miss H."
Me: "Yeah? Well I'm actually older than her!"
Student: "What?! But you're shorter than her!!"

Ages

Talking to some students at recess who have no idea how old I am....

Student from another class: "Miss H, you're like a 14 year old in a 24 year old's body."
Me: "What do you think about me?"
Student: "You're like a 36 year old in a 20-something's body."

Oceanography

Me: "So what do we already know about the ocean?"
Student: "That mermaids and sea demons live there."
Me: "Really? You know that for a fact?"
Student: "It's in my book."

......and he shows me......

Me: "That's a drawing."
Student: "Oh."